February 23, 2025

Are You Stuck? Or Living a Bald Eagle Life?

 

(c) Gary R. Jones

If life were easy we wouldn’t get stuck. Or laugh. It’s all in our perspective.

Which reminds me of the bald eagles who share our beach with us. I love these birds, and I sometimes think it would fun to be one. And then I think: “raw fish.” Eww.

Yes, it’s definitely about perspective.

Do we learn from whatever comes at us, and enjoy life, or do we overwhelm ourselves with resentment and ‘what if’s’?

 Perspective: Ever had an eagle yell at you? One morning about 6 I was out with my dogs, waiting for them to do their “stuff.” An adult bald eagle was perched in a nearby Madrona tree. It peered close at us, glared at my dogs, and then cocked its head to glare at me! And screech! Really, I clean up, but that day I did it facing that screechy bird! I giggled all day, and got some great work done. Does the mundane ever become hilarious? And an inspiration to shine at your work? If not, how can it be? 

(c) Gary R. Jones

Watch your back: Eagles don’t always get along. They’re quite clear about what works for them, and what doesn’t. They get things done.

Do you work out misunderstandings? How? Do you stand your ground when you need to, honoring your commitment to your clients? To yourself? Your family?

Keep your eyes on the prize: Eagles are always watching. Something.

If you don’t reach for the moon, the stars, and everything in between, how do you become great? Be fully present in the moment. Be aware of your surroundings. Be grateful.

Live in the moment: Last spring I saw a bald eagle soaring above I-5 in downtown Seattle, catching the air currents, skillful, unconcerned, uninterested in all the humans stuck in traffic below it. That eagle was free and wild, not impeded by lane changes.

Are you? What inspires you to fly free? What gets you unstuck? What makes you laugh?

I’m willing to learn from my nonhuman mentors. Are you?

© 2012 Robyn M Fritz

 

Getting Unstuck with Bald Eagles

(c) Danny L. McMllin

What inspires you to keep going, no matter what? Is it an admirable person? A dynamic leader? A work of art?

Bald eagles inspire me. Watching them in my Seattle neighborhood reminds me to keep going, no matter what.

Yes, bald eagles.

Why do I write about nonhuman mentors? Because my business is about challenging mindset through storytelling, and creating new ways of thinking about life in the world with my crystal partner, Fallon. Because the people, and businesses, who prosper think outside the norm, to learn from the world around them.

Bald eagles are normal: we just don’t see them that much. So when we do, or hear about them, we stop and think about just what it is we’re seeing. And learning.

I’m inspired by watching eagle generations: the mature bald eagles with the classic white heads and tails and their growing offspring, the mottled maybe-two-year-olds I call the juveniles (okay, maybe the technical term is ‘immature’).

Eagles clearly have the basics in life nailed down. They’re fully present in the act of being bald eagles, even when they goof up.

We, however, live in the most technologically advanced civilization ever, but many of us are stuck. Who isn’t for getting unstuck?

Nail the landing: One morning I looked out the window and saw several dozen crows and gulls in flight, harassing an eagle, who ignored them as it majestically landed in a fir tree. For an instant it was magical, and then the eagle fell out of the tree. As it fell it immediately took flight, with the gulls and crows still after it.

Do you get cocky? Where do you need to tweak your life plans? How quickly do you recover from your goof-ups? In time to soar? Or do you crash? What’s the difference?

Respect your elders; understand the risks: Grace the Cat, our family cat, is an indoor cat except for regular forays through our deck garden. You’d think she’d be clueless about the badass world out there, but she is Grace. She sits in the window, scolds the chickadees and crows, and spies on passing cats, raccoons, possums, squirrels, and even an occasional coyote, but … a bald eagle? One day Grace was strolling towards our sliding glass doors when an adult eagle perched on the light pole across the street swiveled its head and stared right at her. For one stunning instant Grace and the eagle were eye to eye, then Grace promptly flattened herself on the floor, head tucked under her arm. Smart cat, not taking any chances! Scold a crow, yes. Hunt an eagle? Never.

How street smart are you? What do you do when someone is bigger and badder than you are? Duck and cover? Change tactics? Play nice? Hide?

(c) Gary R. Jones

Run in a good crowd: When bald eagles hang out, it’s with other bald eagles. Every other bird is either after them (clearly not successful, since the eagles ignore them) or respectfully hanging on the sidelines.

Who are the eagles in your life? Why? What do you learn from them? What do they learn from you? Do they inspire you?

Our challenge for greatness: I’m willing to learn from my nonhuman mentors. Are you? It’s a lot less pressure, and a lot more storytelling. The thing is, we know humans, even when we think we don’t. But if you look at the nonhumans you see how others get along (or don’t), without all the game playing that humans do. The lessons we learn from them are priceless: we’re not pressured to conform, as we often are with humans. We’re simply given space to observe and appreciate other life.

To get unstuck from the daily grind. To learn from it. Which helps us soar.

Which makes us great.

© 2012 Robyn M Fritz

My Dog Is Dying: The Real Life Crappy Choice Diary, Entry 1

my dying dogThe lure of immortality dances through our lives, weaving delicate patterns that tease us with the possibility.

To live forever.

And then, of course, we don’t.

Honestly, I never expected to live forever. You’re born, crap happens, fun happens, you die. Nope, I never expected to live forever, and I didn’t, either: last February I died of the flu, and, sure, I obviously came back, but I still died. At home in bed with my kids: my dogs, Murphy and Alki, and Grace the Cat.

I never thought Murphy would live forever. My dog. My eldest. She had so many things go wrong early in her life, we were surprised she made it to 3 and celebrated when she hit 5.

Today, January 16, 2012, she is 13-1/2. She’s been healthy and vigorous since she was 5. Mostly. There’s arthritis, things like that.

But to think of “Murphy” and “old age” astonishes me. I’m still more astonished that, somewhere along the way, deep down inside, I thought she would live forever. What an idiot I can be.

I just never expected it: either Murphy’s old age or, then, Murphy dying. I should know better, since I was only 9 when the first person I thought was immortal died, and I’ve lost many people and several animals since then. But somehow I just assumed that Murphy would skip that phase.

And now in the last few weeks I’ve learned that she is dying. Purely by accident, since I am the super careful slightly neurotic overly analytical intuitive, we discovered that she has a tumor on her spleen.

Murphy is dying.

Somewhere in the last few days I decided to record our last journey together, from the shock of discovery to the agony of choice to the stupid things you think of when someone you love is dying. A running journal. The story of almost immortal.

I know how it’s going to end. I don’t know when. I only know it happens a little bit with every breath I take, I can feel it.

The human-animal bond is a strange and wonderful thing. Living a multi-species family life is both inspiring and terrifying: every day you should be realizing that it’s one less day, not one more, but you don’t. You can’t.

Living an intuitive life where you know that all life is equal is also a strange and wonderful thing. You learn about choice, about individual choice, and family choice, and community choice. It’s beautiful. Terrifying. Absurd.

Real life is about choice. Crappy choices are part of it. How do you live, and die? What does it look like? Why should we share it? What can it mean for our lives in community, for our lives as humans with animals, and homes, and businesses, all wrapped up in the mystery of nature and of the planet itself?

What happens when someone you love is dying?

Once again, I’m going to find out. Write about it. Maybe see what you think.

Will it be cathartic? Maybe. Angry? You bet. Resigned? Never. Goofy and absurd? Most likely. True? Every single word.

Even in my most optimistic moments I can’t see anything positive coming from this, because at the end Murphy will be gone.

But something is coming.

We shall see.

© 2011 Robyn M Fritz

Choosing Our Way in the New Economy

He didn’t mean to make me smile.

He had been loitering by my shopping cart.

We were both stocking up on office supplies. I was, as usual, simply exhausted by the choices. Wouldn’t life be easier if we didn’t have so much to choose from?

Think about it. I do. A lot. Even choosing a donut is fraught with anxiety: should it be raspberry filled, triple chocolate peanut butter, lemon glazed, or pistachio cream cheese?

With so many options, is it a really a donut, or a lifestyle choice?

Okay, maybe donuts are a lifestyle choice, but, really, isn’t it less stressful, less complicated, and equally satisfying to order coffee and a cruller than a caramel macchiato and a blueberry coconut cake donut? While we’re standing there, weighing our choice as if it really mattered, have we done one thing to connect with the people around us, made one step towards building community?

Yesterday in the office supply store the choices weren’t nearly as delectable as donuts. From the store’s towering shelves to the competing bins of goods it was confusing, tiring, and boring. I needed supplies to keep my business running and I’d had a traumatic few weeks. Which is to say I had a lot on my mind and it wasn’t just donuts and office supplies.

I was headed back to my chock full shopping cart when I saw him.

Mid-thirties, clean cut, he stepped away from my cart as he caught my eye and shyly waved at my cart. “I was leaving you something.”

He shrugged sheepishly, then walked back to my cart, picked something up off my stack, and handed it to me. “I thought you could use this.”

It was a coupon for $30 off a $150 purchase.

I laughed and thanked him. We smiled at each other and he left.

Just like that, the day got a whole lot better.

This is the thing I like about the new economy. Yes, it seems like people are a whole lot meaner and greedier. Fear seems to have stripped many of us down to some desperate level where we run right over anyone, or anything, we even suspect might be in our way.

But even more people are paying attention and reaching out to connect, even as simply as handing a shy smile and a $30 coupon to a frazzled stranger.

Those are the things that keep me going. I’m still overwhelmed by the choices in things we can buy. Fewer choices would be simpler, but it might not be better. Don’t know.

What I do know is that sometimes the choices are simple. As easy as handing a stranger a coupon and getting a smile back.

These are the choices I’m liking in the new economy: how we’re finding simpler ways to connect.

What are you choosing?

© 2011 Robyn M Fritz

Living on the Planet of Awesome and Forever

I live on the Planet of Awesome and Forever.

I have proof.

Sometimes my planet is real and physical: I revel in the sun and rain, the dark and stormy, the people and the beings who make me laugh and think while challenging me to be my best, no matter what.

Always my planet is a state of mind, clear in the choice of love over fear.

Love drives the Planet of Awesome and Forever. There are a lot of us here. It’s time for everyone else to join us. Here’s why.

I keep hearing how bad things are out there, how desperate people are, how survival means anything goes.

Well, anything does not go. Not on the Planet of Awesome and Forever. Here’s what that means for me.

In many ways 2011 has been a wonderful year for me: I won a prestigious national award for my book, I launched a new kind of intuitive consultation practice—a partnership with my crystal, Fallon—and I’ve met fascinating new people on their own amazing journeys. It’s been both humbling and exciting.

I’ve also faced stunning difficulties:

  • a virulent flu that derailed most of my year
  • a crisis that both complicates and enlightens my future
  • people who learned from me and then stole my work
  • people who expected me to work for free while they paid themselves (welcome to the new feudalism)
  • negligent and uneducated vets who endangered my dogs

So here’s what I did:

  • I took time to get well.
  • I looked for alternatives that make life easier for me and for my family.
  • I turned some matters over to an attorney.
  • I strengthened my resolve to model compassionate, thoughtful interactions.
  • I continued to quietly build a business that enriches my life as it serves an enlightened community.
  • I’m bringing the vets up on charges. Oh, you better believe that one!

And here’s what happened, just in the last few weeks.

  • I am finding answers that are healthy and make sense.
  • I discovered attorneys can be a good thing, and that controversy can both enlighten and strengthen.
  • I decided that if I’d had a choice 20 years ago, I’d still choose the pain and limitations of being disabled and having to reinvent a life over being an asshole and a thief and never finding my path.
  • If you open yourself up to love, fear just bounces the hell off:
    • I’ve made wonderful new friends who think my intuitive practice with a partner who’s a crystal is intriguing, fun, and worthwhile.
    • Neighbors came running to help my recovering dog.
    • A close friend whose mother is dying raced to the vet ER and massaged a painful kink out of my shoulder.
    • A dear friend who is undergoing her own family crisis cheerfully bathed my stinking dogs in exchange for a home-cooked meal.
    • Two wonderful vets who love my dogs expertly cared for them.
    • I finally met my eldest dog’s ‘grandma,’ and we’ll be celebrating life, love, and Cavaliers with her and her family next week, on what will be my multi-species family’s 13th anniversary together.

Life is awesome!

Choosing Love Over Fear in a Practical World

Here’s what I know. Choosing love over fear doesn’t solve all our problems, because we won’t always agree. But choosing love does model our choices.

My experiences this year have sobered and intrigued me. What I and so many people see out there is troubling and encouraging. Troubling, because serious problems exist. Encouraging because many people are choosing healthy, compassionate ways to explore and resolve them.

We urgently need to define community, whether it’s our work or our social life. How do we want to live together, and how will we?

Make no mistake: living on the Planet of Awesome and Forever is not naïve. It is not turning a blind eye to the problems. It recognizes the increasing hostility in our society, the strange personal and business meltdowns that are justified in the name of survival. The disquiet is everywhere. I’m not the only one who’s noticed.

Make note: it is not only humans who are concerned. Remember, I work as a professional intuitive, I talk with all manner of beings, and they, too, are advocating change.

It’s time for change.

The first change is a truth check:

  • Anything goes does not work.
  • None of us will survive if ‘survival’ defines our lives.

So here’s a plan:

  • Quit counting the desperation.
  • Start counting the awesome.

Here are my awesomes.

I have the world’s greatest family: a woman, two dogs, and a cat are proving that we’ll always be a family, in body or not, because on the Planet of Awesome and Forever love endures.

If we have to have bad days to get to the good ones, then we will. And we’ll make them count. Because there’s no other real, practical, inspiring choice than love. It’s awesome. And forever.

We live on the Planet of Awesome and Forever:

  • Where nothing is too hard or too much work or too painful
  • Where all beings are held responsible for their choices: firmly, compassionately, clearly
  • Because love and truth are always, always awesome and forever

It’s time to take back love, and community. It’s time to stand up for what’s right, to dig deep into conflict with patience and respect and compassion.

It’s time.

Come join us on the Planet of Awesome and Forever.

It’s your planet, too.

© 2011 by Robyn M Fritz

How an Eagle Kachina Accidentally Helped Build a Community

My mom loved Southwest art. My dad loved my mom. I loved them. When the eagle kachina dropped into our lives, I was greedily snatching as much time with them as I could, building memories.

One day my dad called and said he’d found an art piece for mom. “Not like yours,” he said wryly. 

“Oh, bummer,” I said.

We both giggled, remembering the day years before when I’d announced that I’d bought my first art piece. “Does it have horses?” he’d asked. Of course it did.

“So what is it, Indian stuff?” I asked now, referring to mom’s penchant for all things Southwest, right down to their interior décor.

“Of course,” he said. “But it’s big, so when you come down for Christmas will you take me to get it?”

“Absolutely.” I was touched, my parents never asked for much.

A Family’s Last Holiday

So at Christmas that year, I drove dad downtown to pick up his gift for mom. We got it safely home and unwrapped it together, while Dad told me the story of how they found it. Dad was crippled with rheumatoid arthritis, so it fell to me to giftwrap it, ironic, since he had taught me the art of giftwrapping when I worked for him in his business.

We didn’t quite know what to make of this art piece: about two feet wide and tall, it was a copper sculpture, partly painted turquoise, with a curious mixture of human and really big bird. We knew it was the artist’s representation of native American art and spirituality, but that was it: we were appreciative, but ignorant, barbarians.

Eagle Kachina, the tag said. Expensive and hard to wrap, I thought, and not my taste.

But it was clearly my mom’s. Christmas Eve she ripped off my lumpy wrapping and spent the next week dragging Mr. Eagle Guy, as we called it, around the house, trying to decide where to hang it.

I reveled in that Christmas. I got to help my dad give a gift to my mom. I got to listen to my mom babble about it. And I got to share a small family moment with my parents, a moment where we celebrated and had fun together, glorying in the family bond. In community.

As it turned out, it was also the last Christmas I shared with my parents. My dad died in June, and my mom 10 months later.

The Eagle Kachina Comes Home … Sort Of

When we closed up their home, my brother and I sorted out who got what. I insisted on taking Mr. Eagle Man, not because I really liked it, but because it was a concrete reminder of a wonderful last holiday with my parents, at a time when illness and disability dulled all three of us.

No question the piece came home to live with me.

Years went by. Years when I moved the piece around the house. It was beautiful, yes, but not my taste.

It also didn’t belong in my home.

Things like this happen. However they end up with us, the objects in our life don’t always fit. Sometimes we change, or they do, and it’s time for them to move on. The trick is to recognize that and to figure out what happens next.

Truth is, the eagle kachina never fit in my home. These days I work as a professional intuitive, which means I talk with things, from animals to businesses, homes, nature, and, yes, objects, including this piece. Back then I only knew that the piece was sentimental but just plain felt odd to me. It didn’t belong with me. Finally acknowledging that, I thanked it for its service to my family, and asked it to start looking for a new home, while also promising that I would not simply discard it. It was beautiful, full of family memories, and also represented an artist’s vision of a sacred object. It needed to call, and be called, home. Wherever home was.

It stayed with me for a long time, because no matter what I did, I couldn’t find out anything about the piece or the artist, or how to properly, well, rehome it. Not surprising, I guess, because it had been years, and the artist might have moved on, literally and artistically.

The Search for Home

Years went by.

One day, my new friend Tara came by. I was showing her my small condo, and she took one look at the eagle kachina and said, “When you’re ready to sell that, let me know.”

Hmm.

She told me that she collects Southwest art, and she thought my piece would fit well with a large metal sculpture that she’d purchased several years before. She’s a real estate agent and a Reiki master with an easy strong intuition, so when she said she wanted the piece, I just smiled.

She suggested that the store she’d bought her large piece from would know how to value it. So I emailed Hogan Trading Company with a picture and a question.

They promptly emailed back: not only could they put a value on it, they represented the artist, Dale J. Anderson. I spent a few minutes exploring his art at their website. Intriguing. After years wondering, all it took to find the artist was a new, visiting friend.

Strange small world. Awesome universe.

More time went by, because truth is, even when special pieces have to go, a part of you still clings to them. The kachina had to go. Talking with the piece, I knew that it belonged with Tara. The kachina and I both needed time to separate from each other: it was as if we’d both been waiting for its new home to show up before we could really say goodbye to each other. There had to be a new community before the old one could end.

Finally, I told Tara to come get it. Even though she’d only seen it once, briefly, months before, she promptly agreed.

I carefully wrapped it and Tara took it home.

Not long after, she called. The eagle kachina fit perfectly in her home: its beauty and its energy felt great. She was thrilled because it went so well with the treasured, large sculpture she’d invested so much in.

The odd extra touch: when she unwrapped it, she discovered the two pieces were by the same artist.

The eagle kachina really was home.

Treasures of Community

Truth is, I could have kept the piece in the family, or put it up for auction, or done any number of things with it. But the only thing I felt right about was honoring my parents’ love and family bond by finding another family that would fit this piece. It needed a community, and I couldn’t let it go without that.

Its home now is with Tara. For me, the circle is complete. I’ve been lucky enough to meet new people in a new community, and the eagle kachina has bridged both of them. It’s home now. And so am I.

© 2011 Robyn M Fritz

Soaring into Spring with the Bald Eagles of Alki

Spread Your Wings

I am constantly blessed to witness the love of art and artistic genius in the world, especially when it’s literally in my back yard.And to bring it to the world as best I can. It is all part of building community.

My neighbor and friend, Danny L. McMillin, is an athlete, a computer expert, a proud REI employee, a friend of terriers, currently Airedales (and cats, and my own beloved Cavaliers), and the husband of my good friend, Ellen.

Danny is also an artist whose photography never fails to stun and delight me and all of us who see it and are lucky enough to own a piece. Danny has freely offered me wonderful photographs for Bridging the Paradigms, and is in fact the artist behind the stunning photograph of Alki Beach that is the foundation of my branding and my websites’ banners. I am so proud of this amazing artist!

Taking Flight

Danny recently sent me pictures of a bald eagle launching itself from the dying Madrona tree above our West Seattle neighborhood.

Here’s the sequence, with Danny’s permission. Please note they are (c) 2011 Danny L. McMillin. And please share them with everyone you know: our bald eagles are precious to us, as are the artists like Danny who photograph them.

If you’d like to contact Danny about purchasing one of his pictures, from eagles to nature shots, please contact me and I’ll make sure he can find you.

Airborne!

Enjoy the eagles, and thank you, Danny!

(c) 2011 Robyn M Fritz

The Guardians of Alki

Yes, I talk with gardens and the beings who look out for them: where I live, I call them the Guardians of Alki, because Alki Beach is our neighborhood, and the names the guardians have historically been assigned are mean and scary and not worthy of us or them. Besides, at the time it didn’t occur to me to ask them their name, or that it might be inappropriate (it is) to just give them one. This is how I learned a good lesson on naming.

The first time I saw the Guardians, I was closing up the house for the night when I noticed all these strange-looking beings were milling around in the backyard, on the wild, isolated hillside that few people can actually see. Some looked like walking trees, others like plants, others like combinations of people and plants. None of them looked human, but they were also picnicking and settling down to peep in my window! I had never seen anything that looked remotely like these beings, and all I could do was stare. Then, like any normal, rational human, I turned away, muttering, “Criminy, I need drugs.”

Of course, I couldn’t resist one more peek. That’s when they noticed me. “Look, there she is!” a few yelled, so I was sure that, yes, they were peeping! And making a game out of it! Then they waved at me.

Dumbfounded, I stared, then thought, Oh, what the heck (it’s kind of my motto now). I waved back. Slowly. Bemused, to say the least.

That’s how I met the Guardians. Turned out they were gardeners, so for the next year I worked with them to rehabilitate the ruined gardens at our condo, from the soil up (and yes, there were real humans doing the work, not me, I’m physically handicapped). Finally, it was October, and I was rushing to get plants into the garden before winter. These beings had been nothing but helpful: to the wild and domestic land that surrounds us to the amazing being that is our neighborhood. But winter was coming quick, and the plants weren’t yet purchased or planted. The Guardians were anxious to go into the garden before winter, so I invited them to come into my home and live with us for a month until the plants were in—as long as they first got approval from my animals.

One of the guardians, the smallest, shyest, and most unusual looking (like a possum with a bright green round bush growing out of its back) took me up on the offer and moved in. My animals didn’t mind, and it often made me laugh, because it would hide and peek out at me as I walked by, and then duck under the furniture when I teased it: “I can see you.”

Some time after that I read something that made me realize that other people didn’t call these beings Guardians. They were formally known as fairies, and many people used to think, and maybe still do, that fairies are bad guys and will hurt us if they can (why, I have no idea).

I was astonished that somebody with that kind of reputation would do what the Guardians had done: benignly, patiently help me build a garden. Or fail to identify themselves, which seemed, somehow, wrong. After all that work together, I thought they should have told me who they were. Why, I have no idea. (Note again that at the time it never occurred to me to ask them their name; I was arrogant and unthinking in simply assigning them a name based on the work I thought they did.)

Honestly, I didn’t really know what a fairy was, and still don’t. (One of the things my guides like about me is that I’m somewhat clueless about the in’s and out’s of things like witchcraft, shamanism, or folklore, so I’m bold and daring (they said this, laughing), or at least open to new experiences that aren’t pre-defined. For example, I think about talking with something, like an oil spill, and then I’m there. The first few times I did this I had no idea people called it astral traveling. I think this is also why I have such a large community of beings who accompany me on my conversational jaunts, as I sometimes goof up and need backup, and they are all easily amused. The closest I’ve come to accidentally killing myself I was tackled by an annoyed guide, so I’m learning to be more cautious.)

So anyway, there they were, looking at me, and I was mad. “You’re fairies?” I yelled. “You’re fairies? Why didn’t you tell me you were fairies?”

They very solemnly looked at me and said, “If you knew they called us fairies, would you have invited us into your home?”

That stopped me in my tracks. Would I? Does a name make a difference, or is it the work, or intent? What a lesson!

“Yes,” I said. “Because I know and trust your work. What they call you doesn’t matter.”

Something changed in that moment. They looked at me, at each other, and smiled. And when the garden was finally planted, the Guardians of Alki moved into it and settled down for the winter, including the little visitor. By then it was November, and quite mild. I worried about that. Even I knew it takes awhile for a garden to get established, and a freeze could ruin everything.

It was the land and the weather itself that answered me, joking. “Did you think we’d put you to all this work and then freeze the garden?”

I laughed and relaxed. We had a mild, dry winter that year, unusual for Seattle. In fact, I had to drag out the hose and water most of the winter. But spring was worth it.

And, a year later, a coyote appeared regularly outside my office window. For two springs and summers I grinned happily as I watched this wild dog play on an isolated hillside, nap, scratch its fleas, try to catch a bird shadow, tease my cat, dash away when it accidentally spotted me, and lounge while I worked. Yes, I knew more about animals than plants, had spent three years turning a ruined landscape into a certified Backyard Wildlife Habitat, complete with some rare native plants, and yet what truly thrilled me was the coyote.

The Guardians knew that. When I exclaimed over the coyote, they said she was a gift, thanks from them for the work I’d done in the garden and on the hillside to re-establish a native habitat. They gently pointed out that their gift was the coyote, because they knew I liked animals better. I was happy but saddened, too. I really did love the garden, but the guardians were right: I loved the coyote more.

To this day I do not know what name the Guardians give themselves. I haven’t asked, and they like the name I instinctively called them. So the lesson in naming continues. And one in appreciation, too, because I really do love the garden, but that coyote…

(c) 2011 Robyn M Fritz

Co-incidence and Community: How A Dog, Three Women, and a Book Saved a Life

Cavaliers and catSometimes we wonder if we’ve done the right thing in life. Sometimes we get lucky and know we did, even though we were just trying to get by. Sometimes that story co-incidentally defines another, which is what building community is all about.

This is the story of how a chronically ill dog saved another dog 10 years later. Nobody saw it coming until it was over. It still makes me smile.

In 2010 I published a small gift book, with essays and comic stories about new ways of thinking about the human-animal bond. Bridging Species: Thoughts and Tales About Our Lives with Dogs, chronicled my journey of buying a dog as a pet, and how I ended up creating a multi-species family with two Cavalier King Charles Spaniels, Murphy and Alki, and Grace the Cat.

My publishing goal? To get people together to talk about what it means to see our animals as not just pets but family members, and how that can help us create community, one family at a time.

I was thrilled when East West Bookshop in Seattle created a book signing event for me. I had three choices for a date, and instantly chose July 16. It just felt right, and I quickly realized why: it would be Murphy’s 12th birthday.

Murphy’s birthday was a stunner all by itself. She’d come to live with me when she was 11 weeks old. We had lots of fun and too many problems: Murphy was chronically ill almost from the first, and at 2-1/2 years the anxiety and vet bills and just plain mystery and misery of her health woes were near to breaking both of us.

People told me to get rid of her and get a new dog.

People do that. The very idea shocked me, and even today is part of the reason why I work so hard to help define and live the idea of a multi-species family. Murphy’s problems were at times debilitating and often expensive, small things that added up and puzzled us, but never things that seemed worth killing her over. That just didn’t seem right.

By December 2000 Murphy had been suffering from a long-term infection no one could pinpoint. For some months she also had eye problems. We finally found Dr. Joyce Murphy, a holistic veterinary ophthalmologist who lived in Port Hadlock, a 5-1/2 hour round trip by car and ferry from our Seattle home.

The whole story is too long to recount here, but the gist of it is that Dr. Murphy took one look at her, exclaimed that she had the “medical record of a 13-year-old dog,” and promptly identified the problem. She operated the next day, essentially giving Murphy tear ducts and a tear gland she didn’t have, and the infection was finally resolved.

We’ve been going to see Dr. Murphy ever since. And when Murphy’s Cavalier brother, Alki, came along, he went there, too. And still does.

Dr. Murphy saved Murphy’s life, and, as I think about it, Alki’s, too.

She’s also been there for us through multiple traumas and illnesses, by phone or by appointment. Murphy, in particular, holds a special place in her heart.

Over the years I discovered that Dr. Murphy did a lot of volunteer work at the Jefferson County Animal Shelter. She and her partner and their staff have helped an awful lot of animals. Many happy multi-species families have benefited from her warm, generous heart and skilled veterinary services, families created through the shelter.

When I published my book I decided to give something back, to honor in my small way the work that Dr. Murphy did with my own—my writing. I gave her 5 copies and said to sell them and put the money into her shelter work.

Some time later the dogs and I were in Port Hadlock, getting a checkup with Dr. Murphy. She very seriously thanked me for donating the books to her practice, said that they had sold and the buyers thought my book was “excellent.”

She then told me what she did with the money. An older dog had come to the shelter, he needed “this and that,” medicine and surgery and general fixing up, but he’d recovered nicely, and was now in a happy home, as delighted with his new family as they were with him.

She said he lived because I donated book sales to the shelter.

In my usual blunt and occasionally tactless way I said, “I don’t think my books paid for all that.”

She didn’t miss a beat. She, too, is into creating community.

She said that her work as a vet and my work writing my book produced the sales that made the money that went to the shelter that saved the dog and created a new family.

“It’s all about community,” she said.

And she was right.

I felt pretty warm and fuzzy. My book got compliments and, bonus! somehow figured in saving an old dog’s life.

My old dog started it! It was her problems and our solutions that made me start thinking about looking at the human-animal relationship as something more than just a human and a pet. Dr. Murphy is the reason my Murphy lived, she’s how Murphy and I got the time to create a family that I could write about.

But the story doesn’t end there.

Clearly, Dr. Murphy is popular with dog people in these parts. One of her clients is a well-known, respected Cavalier breeder who had moved to the area from several states away. I didn’t even know that she was here or one of Dr. Murphy’s clients until she bought one of the books I donated to the shelter at Dr. Murphy’s office. And praised it so highly that Dr. Murphy passed on the compliment.

It was some of that Cavalier breeder’s money that bought the book that saved that old dog’s life at the animal shelter. And, 12 years earlier, that Cavalier breeder was also the owner of the stud dog who became my Murphy’s dad.

This was the story I shared at East West Bookshop at our book signing on July 16, 2010. On the very day that the little dog people kept telling me to give up on celebrated her 12th birthday: happy, healthy, energetic, a bit arthritic, and, practically unheard for a Cavalier at that age: heart clear.

Co-incidence? Let’s have more of them.

On July 16 people paid a small amount to come to my book signing. The money went to the Jefferson County Animal Shelter, in care of Dr. Murphy, to honor all of our work, together. We gave her $90, not a lot, but something.

And what she did with that money is another story, for another time.

For now, this is what I know: this story will never stop making me smile, just like the little dog who started it all.

(c) 2011 Robyn M Fritz

Sinking or Swimming While Writing Your Book

The hardest book I’ve ever done? My own.

No kidding. Not even the analytical, skeptical, intuitive, optimistic cynic in me saw that one coming.

In all the years I’ve written and worked with other authors, nurtured them through the writing and publishing process, never have I had so much trouble! I astonished myself with the insecurities, self-doubts, indecisions, and writing quandaries that I routinely help other people through. I laughed at myself and couldn’t help it. I learned, again, why it’s so important to get competent outside help to develop and publish your book, whether you’re going the solo indie route or shopping it to an editor or agent.

I guess you call it living the process.

 

 

I was smart enough to hire the best designer out there: Robert Lanphear of Lanphear Design. Several years ago Bob had graciously agreed to work with me on a complex technical marketing book, and I’d promised him an art book some day. What he got was an idea for my book: a collection of essays and comic stories about how I created a family with my dogs (and cat), a small book that people could give as gifts. I’ll detail the story of how Bob made me not only finish the production of the book but re-think how I wanted it to look. How he was right. And why it mattered.

I was also smart enough to hire a wonderful photographer, Mary Van De Ven, who is also a massage therapist and Reiki master. Mary and I actually met in Reiki class, and have become good friends. After Bob refused to let me do my book cover the way I thought it should be done I hired Mary to conduct a new photo shoot, an exhausting 5-hour process (you try to get a cat to pose politely with two dogs) that ended with me and the dogs at the beach, pretty much how Bob and I had discussed it.

So here’s a public thanks to Bob and Mary for helping making my dream come true. And for the one thing no writer would ever dream of and absolutely needs: a cover that sells the book all by itself.

(c) 2011 Robyn M Fritz